In a women’s clothing section, there is a chair. That is – the man’s chair. It is a very pitiful sight, because the man who sits there has ran through the thousands of possible ways to pass the time, while the zombie wanders in the clothes section. He has already;
1. Played all the preview video games, and beat all the high scores, and trash talked the kids that played before him, “Yeah, you’re not the Dragon King now, are you? Uh Uh. I am. That’s right.”,
2. Acted like an employee of the store and misdirected people who ask for directions,
3. Found the hack code to use the “info” phones and make announcements over the store intercom, “Today is “Don’t use your Smart phone in the store” day, because we want you to focus on our annoying ads,” “Today is “Don’t yell at your man because he leaves his socks in the front room floor” day. Dr. Phil said so,” and “If we hear your kids crying, you will pay double for everything,”
4. Turned up all the radios in the electronics section loud to different stations, and danced around crazily,
5. Went into all the bathroom stalls in the men’s room, lock the stall doors, and crawl out underneath them. Note: Some men will have a hard time doing this (The getting back out underneath part),
6. Told people the endings of the books they pick up to buy, then duck when they throw them,
7. Found and put on a scary masks and jumped up behind the kid photographer taking a picture, making the kid’s cry,
8. Went to the food counter, and took an inordinate amount of time choosing what to buy, then ask very specific questions, “When was the last time you cleaned the grill? With what may I ask? What was the expiration date on that spray? Is that blue slurpee drink from the waters of the Avatar planet? Really? What if this is all a simulation, and that drink is real? Hmm?”
I could keep going, but some guys just give up and go to “the chair,” and hunker down for a long day. He could go to sleep, but then kids would write on his face with mascara, and that would be bad.
I had heard that a group of men wanted to introduce a Bill stating that as long as a man had to wait for a woman to “shop,” they could go into the electronics section and watch anything on the wide screen TV.
Yes, I mean anything.
The Bill never made it past the first vote.
In conclusion, Women and Men both do handle the act of shopping differently. I have just been handed a reminder that men wander in the tool section for hours. I need to investigate if this is because their wives are wandering around in the clothing section. Let me get back to you on that. 😉