The Differences Between Shopping Like a Man or a Woman – Part 1



In general, Shopping is an event, especially on Christmas or on the way to a party that you should have bought something earlier. Anyway, shopping. It seems very simple, really. Going to a store to get something you need or want in exchange for money. Yup, it looks simple on paper, but nothing could be more difficult.

There are many differences between Shopping like a Man or a Woman.

Men contemplate their purchases for hours (before they get to the store), replaying the moment of purchase over and over in their heads. Grabbing the PS3, the Best Buy employees see him tear up a bit and start to clap and cheer, as he makes the long walk to the register lines. A few employees give him a high five as he passes them, and one slyly hand him a tissue to dry his eyes. Then, the magical moment happens as he resides in the #1 spot in line, and he hears those magical words, “I can help you right over here, sir”. It is almost like approaching the President, Angelina Jolie, or both. The man leaves changed forever, or at least until the credit card bill arrives.

20120921_iPhone_5_gallery_001_610x426Men are hunters. They know precisely what they are after. They find it, purchase it, and display it proudly for others to admire.

Women shop much differently than Men.

menwomenshoppingWomen seem to consider purchases prior to making them. They talk to their friends about them, “I’m going to buy that cute leather jacket with the faux fur,” looking around to see the nods of approval.

However, when they enter said store, something strange happens – all the preparation gets wiped from their brains like in “Men in Black”.

They forget what they wanted, and become aimless wanderers in a sea of options. Maybe its the air curtains in the door, or maybe the mechanism that automatically opens the door. Not sure really.

I’ve seen women, brilliant women, that know so much about so many things become so – unsure of anything. As a matter of fact, sometimes they become zombie-like. If a couple is shopping for a baby shower gift, the the guy can walk up and say to her, “How’s it going? The baby will be in High School if you you don’t buy something pretty quick,” the response is a very vague, “Uh Huh”. That response is because the woman is caught in some weird universe know as Shopperia Major. It’s a place where their mind is shown so many options, that it blanks out and go from one side of the area to another looking for, No One Knows What.

Sure, a man can (try and move the process along and) say;

“That’s a great blouse/pair of shoes/travel mug, etc. honey.”

“Really? You like it?”

“Yes, I really do,”

and then it goes back on the rack, and the cute zombie you came with wanders off to not choose something else for another 20 minutes.

To be continued next week…

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What Summer 2013 Movies are you Most Excited About Seeing? Take our Poll


Summer is a great time to escape the heat and watch a great (and sometimes not so great) movie in the theater. There are a lot of choices during the rest of the summer of 2013;

After Earth (5/31)
Now You See Me (5/31)
The Purge (6/7)
The Internship (6/7)
Much Ado About Nothing (6/7)
This is The End (6/12)
Man of Steel (6/14)
World War Z (6/12)
Despicable Me 2 (7/3)
Lone Ranger (7/3)
R.I.P.D. (7/19)
Disney’s Planes (8/9)
Elysium (8/9)
Kick Ass 2 (8/16)

Please take our poll below and choose the movie(s) you are the most excited about seeing in the Summer of 2013.

How To Increase Chances of Winning Radio/TV Contests and Not Have to Listen to The Radio The Whole Day – Not So Dumb Tip


Everyone wants to win contests, but you normally can’t listen to a certain radio station all day to get the “Winning Word” then call in at a certain time or song. What if life happens and you miss the word, or don’t know the song to listen for to call in? It makes you not want to try to win, but keep reading, help is on the way.

Border Listen to Win

or let’s say that you are watching a TV show to write down all the daily “Winning Words” to win a contest. What if you miss watching for a day or two? It makes you get cynical and give up on even trying, but buck up ‘lil camper we have help from lots of other people who want to help you out.

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Continue reading

Bad Hairstyles for Men and How to Fix Them

In my opinion, Men in general have no style. The men that do have style are magical, but the rest of us are trying our best, which usually isn’t.

Take hair, for example.

Men have a short time to do stylish things, before our hair falls out, and when a clock is running, men get desperate and do desperate things, like these;


The famous Mullet. I had one, and you did, too. Admit it. I dare you to add a pic of your mullet to a comment on the post.


Hey Dad, See what me and my brother did with the hair clippers while you were at work. Cool, huh?


What the Flock – of Seagulls. Sometimes an idea that sorta worked on Mtv definitely didn’t work in real life. So I say, You Run, You Run so far away from this please.


The Wall of product and hair. I wonder if that hair style could break through a window?


Ahhh! It’s an explosion of hair. He could play the before picture of a human dandelion.

Oops hair

This hair style is called the Oops, style.


When Men start to lose it (their hair I mean), they do things like this. The not too subtle comb-over.


The “My head and hair are art” cut. From a marketing perspective, I can see this coming in handy. I could shave in “” on my head and walk around, but then this idea gets creepy…


See, creepy.

If all else fails, you can wear a hat (all the time) like Brett Michaels or The Edge.


Here are some tips to deal with a bad hair style/cut:

or you could go to the Mormon Beauty School

Noah Munck Mans Up in Nicky Deuce – Red Carpet Premiere and (Non Spoilery) Review



I had the extreme privilege of attending the Nicky Deuce premiere last night at the at the Arclight Theater:


Trivia Part One: This was not the first time Noah has used a New York, tough guy accent. He used it in his role in the 2007 film “Rainbow Tribe” playing Ryan.

Apart from the history of the site the event was held, it was so cool to see the amazing red carpet event for Nicky Deuce;

The Red Carpet

Noah Munck (Nicholas Borelli/Nicky Deuce) on the Red Carpet


Cristine Prosperi (Donna) on the Red Carpet


Noah and Christine on the Red Carpet



The Review (No Spoilers)

This movie was great. It’s a comedic mystery film about Nicholas Borelli growing up from a geeky, overly protected young man into the strong, adventurous Nicky Deuce. The story involves Nicolas visiting his mysterious Uncle Frankie (Steve Schirripa) and his Grandma Tutti (Rita Moreno) in Brooklyn, meeting the darling, Donna (Cristine Prosperi) and soon after becomes a part of mob-ish capers including a Sopranos mini reunion (of sorts) including Steve Schirripa, Michael Imperioli (The Doctor), Tony Sirico (Charlie Cement), Vincent Curatola (Paulie), and of course, James Gandolfini (Bobby Eggs). There are lots of great moments in this film, but the best to see Noah Munck growing beyond the Gibby in an ensemble we’ve been used to and now seeing a more mature Noah stepping into the role as star.

Trivia Part Two: You can get another mob-ish connection with Noah back in iCarly’s “iOpen a Restaurant” episode when Gibby gives an homage to the 1990 film Goodfellas in the Billy Boots and the restaurant fight scene.

The After Party

After the screening, there was a reception in the Arclight Cafe. It was so great to see many of the stars attending the premiere also chatting it up at the reception. There was also a raffle to benefit the Ryan Seacrest Foundation (Such a great guy and a great cause.). It was a great evening already, but then we spotted Andy Dick (fresh from his great run on Dancing With The Stars), and he was so cool to take some time for some pictures and chatting it up with fans. He is a very cool guy.

colleenandandy.jpg large

I have to hand it to Nickelodeon and Mar Vista Entertainment and The Arclight Theater Hollywood for putting on such a great Premiere! Great job all around.

See Nicky Deuce Yourself

Be sure to see the Premiere of Nicky Deuce on Nickelodeon on Monday May 27th at 8PM/7C

Before you Complain Again on Facebook (About Facebook), Kiss and Hug your Toilet Paper Roll

Venezuela, you have a problem.

Supermarket staff work next to partially empty shelves of toilet paper in Caracas

It appears that Venezuela has a toilet paper shortage ( Instead of diving headlong into a political discussion debate, I would simply like for us to appreciate what we have, yes even a pallet full of Costco Toilet Paper. Show your TP some love today, whatever that means to you.

How do you Keep the Bathroom Stall Door Shut (if it has no lock)? 5 Perfect Ways

It’s 2013. We’ve done lots as the human race. I mean we have a Man Groomer (so Men can shave their own backs) mangroomer-3-092706 for Heaven’s Sake, but even with all that, sometimes the small things still allude mankind – like a bathroom stall door that will stay shut the entire “visit”.

There is nothing like running to or from somewhere, let’s say you are in an airport and (of course) your connecting gate is on the other side of the airport (I’m looking at you DFW airport). You run in, praying to the Latrine god that there is a spare. You are in luck! Huzzah! You rush in and quickly look for the lock.

Hmm, you see where it used to be. Now, you realize you are the joke of the Men’s room, because all the other guys ran in this one first and left it because it had no lock. What do you do? Natural is calling – screaming now, so you run through the options of keeping the stall door closed to spare you the weird introduction to the guy waiting, because it eases open when you touch (or look at the side wall of the stall). You could;

1. Use your carry on bag as a Wall of Security (with Cinnamon Bears in a zipped flap), but what if you have no carry on bag, and you’re not in an airport restroom, no lock, what do you do?

2. (This takes planning) Slip in something the size of bottle cap into the slot where the hinge is, or

3. Create one out of the cardboard of the paper butt gaskets or toilet paper and push in the slot on the hinge side, or

4. (This takes lots of focus and multi-tasking abilities) Use your shin (sort of easy) or foot (Very, very difficult) to keep the door shut, or you could buy one of these

5. Introducing the Stall Stopper 5-a-clip-that-prevents-restroom-doors-from-opening. Now, carrying it around all the time after you use it, is all on you, but I wanted to let you know.

So, has the door opened on you? How do you keep the bathroom stall door shut if it has a flimsy or no lock?

Just be glad the bathroom stall door doesn’t sound like a whale.

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Survivor finale 2013 – Geeks Win! Hero of the Week – John M. Cochran

Who thought that the instantly sunburning, social stumbling, smart guy, Cochran could pull off the unthinkable – a Sole Survivor Win. Me, that’s who. More info on this Season: CLick here

CBS' "Survivor: Caramoan Fans VS Favorites" Finale And Reunion

There has been a huge shift from when I was in High School. Geeks were spectacled gigglers hoping to tutor the entire cheer-leading squad, but now they rule the world.

The Big Band Theory TV show was an obvious Main stream shot across the bow of conventional Reality TV fodder, but other geeks were already taking over.

Steve Jobs, and his “prophecy” that he wanted to build a computer for every household, invented the iphone and went farther than anyone could have thought.

Geeks became cool. The paradigm shift happened because some geeks were persistent, began to believe in themselves (Like Cochran proved) and believe that there was a little geek in all of us.

As one Geek to another, Cochran, you rock! Thanks for making smart, sexy again. Oh, and two words for you Cochran, Danica McKellar. You’re welcome.

I have a large bladder and that means I have one job at the movies. Guess what it is.

I like going to the movies. Sometimes I go with my lovely wife


other times I go with a larger group.


I’ve noticed that I have been given a few gifts;

I can wiggle my ears,
I can mimic voices, and
I have a big bladder.

So, because of the bladder thing I have one job at the movies – The Seat Saver. I annoy Sammie, so let’s let her get it off her chest, then I will continue.

FYI – Sammie says the “B” word twice and pronounced Hair as “Her”.

So, since everyone else has stock bladders and I must have gotten the bladder upgrade, I save seats. So what? You say. Well, I invite you to come along when we see movies on the opening night or opening weekend.

Here are some ways I suggest saving seats;

1. Bring a ventriloquist dummy and put on an act;

Person wanting one of the seats I am saving: You saving those seats?
Dummy: You talking to me?
Person wanting one of the seats I am saving: No, the other dummy. Are you saving those seats?
Me: I’m not, the other dummy is, ask him,
this goes on for awhile…

2. Wear a T-shirt that says “Yes, I’m saving these seats for a group of Hell’s Angels that just quit smoking and caffeine yesterday.”
3. Drape “Awake” and “Watchtower” magazines over the seats you are saving, and if someone removes one of the magazines say, “Your address please?”
4. Wear a T-shirt that says “I have taken a 10 year vow of silence until this movie starts”
5. If you are lucky enough to have one other person from the group stay with you. You wear a T-shirt that says, “Got IBS“, then the other person in your group sitting next to you wears a T-shirt that says, “He does (with an arrow pointing to you)” and they have a clothespin on their nose.

What are some other fun ways that you have saved seats at the movie theater on opening weekend for a film?

Please leave a comment and subscribe to our dumb blog.

Pippa Middleton’s Style – is nothing without me

I’ve always been a Pippa fan. I think both sides of her are cute, and I always root for the one who isn’t going to rule England one day (I figure she needs it).

I was lucky enough to attend the royal wedding (You know, the one when her sister got married), a guest of Mr. P. Shop.

I had quite a bit of Botox that morning so I had a very strange look on my face, but I heard that hats were very important to the Brits, so I brought one.


It seemed that Pippa took a shine to me and thought I was the Earl of something and asked me to pose for pictures with her and some red headed guy. She blushed when she read the sign I made for her.


It’s a shame that the royal guards “escorted” me out so quickly after the photos. I told them I could quote almost the entire “Monty Python and The Holy Grail,” but it didn’t do any good. Just for that, I’m returning my Mr. Bean DVD Collection and I will continue to push my “It’s DOWNTOWN, not Downton Abby” petition to 500 signatures. You’ll see!