Getting Ready to Go Somewhere; Men .vs Women

I love Women (especially my lovely, very, very, very understanding wife), but there is a huge difference between how long it takes a guy to get ready, compared to a gal.

Let’s say it’s a dinner for an elderly family member’s birthday. The guy feverishly searches through the mysterious mound at the bottom of the closet of; shirts that don’t fit anymore, MC Hammer pants mchammerpants and two different kinds of flip flops to reveal “The Really Good Shoes”. The guy feels like Indiana Jones Indiana-Jones discovering a lost treasure, then spies a Motely Crue headband motley+crue he wore to the concert he took Ellen “Best Cherry Stem Tie-r in the whole school” cherrystem Smith to. His mind goes back to High School and all the fun he had.

“Are you ready to go, honey?” The voice of a woman running around breaks him from his day dreaming, “Yes,” he says. “You’d better be. We don’t want to be late!” Annoyed, he responds “Alright!”

Continue reading

Men are Dumb, an Intro

Hi! I am Jeff. I’m a married man, and I am dumb. Now, this sounds like I’ve joined a Dumb Guy Anonymous group, but to my knowledge there is none, til now.


I’ll start my own, and let you read the minutes each week (That’s Latin for blog posts. See what I did there). This blog is a way for me to be honest about my (and other guy’s) dumbness and try to help men everywhere stay out of the doghouse. Sure, we may discuss some of the cra- I mean, different ways that women walk through life with all their rules, but we will be nice about it. Right, guys?

The name of the blog if Men are Dumb, and I Should Know. The reason for the title is I thought I was the smartest man aliveuntil I got married.

Men discovered; The Wheel, Fire, but still can’t remember to put the toilet seat down.

It all started with an Intervention with my fiancĂ©, her top 5 MySpace friends and her tearful Mom trying to explain much of what I thought was cool (a choir of Big Mouth Billy Bass fishes singing “Don’t Worry, Be Happy” as people walked into my apartment, building a replica of Disneyland out of empty soda cans, and claiming that I was “going green” because my dog licked my plates clean after dinner, etc), wasn’t.


So, welcome to my blog, and I hope I can help other men not be as dumb, and do my best to help women not sigh and shake their heads at men (so much).